Ted agrees to let Barney spice up his love life, and ends up on a crazy adventure of flying to Philadelphia, encountering the law and visiting the Liberty Bell.
Nancy gets busted and Heylia teaches her about a $14,000 lesson. Doug and Celia make kitchen talk. The kids have daddy problems during diversity week. Bread-sticks and Scones, Nancy's bakery, opens and doesn't start off so well. And Celia retakes the PTA by way of a technicality.
Allison dreams that she's a woman who's been committed to a mental institution in 1959. After viewing taped sessions from the clinic, Allison discovers that the woman from her dream had made claims of being Allison DuBois, living in 2005.
George Sr. is placed under house arrest by the family's new attorney Bob Loblaw, and finds that it's not exactly a walk in the park. Michael sets up his first date with Rita, but Rita has an unfortunate encounter with the family beforehand.
Jack's old mentor, Gerard, comes to Nolita with a strange request. He wants Jack's food to feed him to death. Meanwhile, Steven and Seth's authority drives Jim to find his way up the kitchen hierarchy with ineffective results.
The search of a missing 17-year-old girl, whose trip to Miami turns into an ongoing nightmare.
Mona decides to embrace her birthday for a change and throw a party honoring Dee Dee and her. However, the event is spoiled by Phylllis's gift to Mona: a certificate to have her eggs frozen at a fertility clinic. Meanwhile, Dee Dee receives a great job offer with a law firm, but decides to pass because her instincts tell her something else will come along. Her friendship with an NBA star soon leads to a new opportunity for a career.
A sportscaster becomes a full-time dad when his ex-wife decides to accept a job out of the country and his teenage daughter, Breanna, moves in with him.
Todd takes action when Toni has difficulty handling her motherly duties. Meanwhile, Joan becomes fed up with her friends' freeloading at the J-Spot.
When Simon and Rose (Sarah Thompson) decide to make some changes to their relationship, Eric and Annie happily assume that the two are breaking up. A pregnant Sandy decides to move into Rose’s old apartment as she no longer wants to stay in the college do
This round features fun-loving, flamboyant females from Brighton. Margaret fell in love with the West Indies while on holiday, so she's bringing a Caribbean theme to her menu.
Brent and Emma make a deal to quit their bad habits; Emma takes up a new hobby to help her get over her withdrawal and things go downhill from there. Davis and Karen's ride-along program proves more popular than they'd expected. Hank becomes a slave to his electronic organizer.
Eight Canadians with poor driving skills are sent to an army base. They undergo challenges to enhance their driving abilities. Weekly, the most improved driver leaves. The last remaining participant is deemed Canada's Worst Driver.
Danny is with blackjack player Gabe Labrador who's wearing a wig and counting cards. The man doesn't want to stop playing and claims he must win big to pay off the men who kidnapped his daughter. Ed, Mike, Danny and a cop from Metro work on the case even though they aren't sure Gabe is telling the truth. Mary seems to still be helping Danny taking care of his dad's stuff. She is still dating Jake. A player who won a lot of money wants to give it back, but then wants it back, then wants to give it again, etc. Sam and Woody (from "Crossing Jordan") are getting very well acquainted... Jordan from "Crossing Jordan" is also in this episode.
The phenomena becomes more widespread as similar creatures wreak havoc on the coast of Texas. Laura gets more upset after she loses her job, while Rich still has a difficult time getting over the loss of his brother. Rich's situation gets worse when he starts to hear his brother's voice when he is near water. Cirko and Lee find that the creatures have been digging under the ocean bed, which could link them to global warming. Meanwhile, Miles discovers that it's not safe to raise Nimrod in the backyard when lightning strikes.
Carrie finds out that while dating, Doug lied about getting a job to get her to sleep with him.
Paige has her entire future planned out; she is going to the best university in Canada, Banting, and she will live with Matt and everything will be perfect. That is until Matt comes back changed. Soon things go from bad to worse when Alex convinces her to get stoned with her. Meanwhile Jimmy is proud to be the new basketball coach but a new member, Derek., poses trouble.
Lilly re-opens the case of young girl, an overweight college freshman named Laurie, who died in a fraternity house fire in 2004. The fire was deemed accidental at the time, but a cell phone photo e-mailed from the girl's phone just moments before her death prompts a closer examination.
Whitman has gotten on the wrong side of Chrissy after catching him in the female changing room. At the monthly M&M meeting, Hurley places Rob in a position to speak out against Whitman in front of the entire department.
Calvin continues to spend time with his other family, and the barbershop suffers in his absence. Isaac steals a famous client from Yinka, and the two barbers eventually come to blows. A ventroliquist and his dummy cause trouble for Jen and Dana at the bed and breakfast. Yinka falls in love with a married Nigerian woman (Nzinga Blake). Romadal is arrested for assault.